15 September 2010
why i love my children
She's groggy after her nap. My face lights when I see her, rosy cheeked, calm, hesitant.
I open my arms and embrace her tiny body needing love. "Would you like some tea?"
Nodding yes, she takes her seat at the table and I prepare her cup. "Mommy, don't stir it up." I bring her the tea with a spoon so she can stir it herself.
Then I just sit near her and watch her as she delights in the moment. I do, too She's beautiful, sipping tea. Our eyes meet and the love wells in me.
Why do I love her so? It is a mystery.....she, who can't yet make me tea or help me much at all, only provide me with more work, responsibility, challenges.
Not always do I feel love. Oh no, there are plenty of moments full of frustration, disappointment, even disgust. But underneath, that driving force...is love.
I know it too, by others' love. My dad especially. He gets this twinkle in his eye and smiles a certain smile, and just for a moment, I can feel his love. I've seen him with his grandchildren, too.
A friend wrote once of how it's etched in her memory, her mom always saying, "God gave me good babies."
I've tried to say that, too, and have slowly found my own language.
I tell them often they can't grow up. That they'll get in trouble if they have another birthday. And I hope they know by the twinkle in my eye that I delight in them right now. Just the way they are.
Where does that love come from?
I think it is a gift. Planted within each of us. A desire to give love to others, to enjoy the people God created.
It is also a window into the character of God, of Jesus.
He sees us, always. And He delights in us--moments of sheer joy in who we are--who He's made us--frozen always in eternity.
So we sit, my daughter and I, finishing a cup of tea. And in my heart I well up with praise that I am loved, not for what I do, but because God just chose to.
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: while we were sill sinners, Christ died for us.
I return thanks to Him whom all thanks is due:
--Peace in my surroundings, in my heart
--New experiences with my children
--A push to go deeper, say "yes" to the Spirit calling me to the harder places
--Beauty of each dahlia, creatively fashioned and beautifully knit together, but for a moment in time
--Fun with our new kittens ShiverEliot and TuckerGeorge ( I had to add something literary to their names)
--Visiting with my brother and sister and nephew
--Crunchy, sweet, perfect apples
--Kind neighbors teaching my children in ways I can't, family too
--My brother staying in the basement
--Faithful promises of meeting Christ each moment
--Beautiful fall days
--Lovely gold pears ripe for canning
--Timmy learning to talk and Dawsy learning to read at the same time
--Exhaustion of a day of hard work and the good rest that follows
--Daily bread in the Bible that never grows old, gets stale
photos: fall beauty around here, text: Romans 5:8,NIV